Let’s start with the understanding that despite what your cheating husband tells you, it was his choice and not your fault that he cheated. Yes, there may have been some difficulties in your marriage but that still didn’t give him the right to betray your trust.
Ok, somehow the two of you must have disconnected emotionally and/or intimately and that created the environment for the infidelity to occur. The loss of emotional intimacy may be what fueled the affair but it was still a choice he had to make. He could have turned to you and worked out the issues but he decided to make a bad decision. Now your cheating husband has turned your life and marriage upside down.
Sometimes the betrayed spouse is unaware of how serious the problems were in the marriage until the affair is uncovered. Sometimes there is a disconnect between perception and reality, or in some cases a denial of the truth. The cheating spouse takes the cowardly way out and instead of fighting to get intimacy and the emotional connection restored, he turns to another person to fill the empty void.
Reasons Why Your Cheating Husband May Have Cheated
Lonely Cheating Husband
Sometimes life becomes so busy for couples they hardly spend any time together nurturing their relationship. With long work hours and commuting and meeting all of the children’s needs, little time is left for spouses to grow closer. In fact, in some cases the couples function as two adults living under the same roof with shared home and children responsibilities. On top of the busyness of life, there may be disagreements or tension in the marriage.
If this relates to your marriage it could be that your cheating husband used the distancing between you to justify having an affair. Instead of turning to you to meet his (emotional and intimate needs) he decided to be unfaithful.
Angry Cheating Husband
There are some men who have never learned how to deal with hurt and conflict. They sometimes think that the way to release anger or get back at someone who they believe treated them wrong is to get revenge.
In this case perhaps your husband has felt mistreated by you in your relationship. If that’s the case in his mind he might have convinced himself that it’s ok to cheat. In fact, he might even believe that you are the cause of him having an affair and thus want to blame you.
If your cheating husband did so as a result of feeling lonely then the two of you must work out how you got to the point of feeling disconnected. It might require some difficult discussion about why the “other woman” was able to fill this void instead of you.
If your husband turned to cheating out of anger then it might be helpful to get some help in learning how to deal with conflict. Changing the way you both communicate and resolve issues might help your cheating husband turn to you instead of, another woman in times of crisis.
Your cheating husband may have reasons for being unfaithful. It’s obviously your choice now how you deal with it. The key going forward is to work together to understand the reasons why the affair happened and work towards building a marriage strong enough to withstand the pressures of life.
Don’t let a cheating husband keep you from being happy and restoring your marriage.
See here now, Affair Repair, and get guidance from an expert on how to recover from a cheating husband.
D P Haynes